I am excited to write this post for you today. It is nearing one of my favorite times of the year, and I am anxious to see what the Lord will do in my heart and life in the days leading up to this. What day is this you may ask?
July 6
The 2 year anniversary of the day I
recommitted my life to Christ!
On this day 2 years ago I turned my life around and began living to honor God instead of for the approval of others and myself. I had fallen into a hole of self pity, depression, anxiety, and fear. I felt alone, trapped, and worthless. Some days I had a difficult time getting myself out of bed, anxious thoughts flooded my mind constantly, I couldn't enjoy things that usually made me smile, and often my chest felt so heavy it almost seemed like I was in a box.
The day I surrendered my sorrows, fear, anxiety, and heart to God He began to transform me. From that day on the fire has not died and I am still living sent as a child of God. I cannot imagine where I would be now had that change never occurred. I am in awe knowing that all of the difficulties my family and I endured in the 2 years leading up to that moment in my life were shaping me to be able to handle the rest of my future.
I am reminded that every trial prepares us for what lies ahead. God is preparing in advance what He needs us to do, and I am so thankful that He was with me every step of the way through my depression in high school and freshman year of college.
Now, I'm not saying I don't struggle anymore. . . I still suffer from anxiety from time to time and tend to battle with fear when I let my guard down and become overwhelmed and take my focus off of God. Yet He is with me fighting those battles against the devil and walking beside me as He leads me on by the Holy Spirit.
He uses those quiet moments in my car to speak to me through the silence in my mind or the words sang on the radio. He uses people around me to lift me up and urge me to push on. He sends amazing believers to encourage me in my worship and music so that I am reminded why I began leading worship in the first place. He even brought me to a place I was against in order to shape my life for ministry. I am forever thankful for Ozark and how it changed my life for the better.
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Looking back now, July 6, 2016 doesn't seem that far away but thinking back on all that has taken place since then is unbelievable. God has been so good, and I cannot even begin to explain all He has done in my life- I'd for sure forget something and leave details out!
July 6 will be a day of celebration for me in the years to come. It has become a day I am reminded of who I am and where I have been so that I am ready for where I will go.
Overcoming trials is never easy, and often times we are never completely over them, but God is faithful, and with Him we will win the battle against the enemy. He has already won, remember?
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As I prepare to celebrate my 2 year anniversary of being a born-again Christian I am excited to remember and look ahead to what all God has in store for me! Some people may not understand how special this day is to me, but that's okay.
I will go to sleep the night before excited to wake up and remember that day like it was yesterday. I was at a massive conference surrounded by thousands of other teenagers, sitting in a bleacher chair praying to God for healing and strength, sobbing loudly with my best friends praying over me, and Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone) being played by the band.
In that moment my chains of burden and fear were lifted and I experienced a weight lifted from my shoulders. In those few seconds of relief God assured me that I was going to make it through this, my life meant something, and I could not give up. The life I wanted to give up on and stop the pain of, God wanted to redeem and restore for His glory. Now I am able to share my story with others and give them a light in their dark world, like a dear lady did for me many years ago. My only hope is to be half as amazing of a counselor someday as the lady that changed my life with her mental health practice.
If God can meet a stubborn, sassy mess like me personally in a room of thousands of people, He can meet you. Don't keep shutting Him out. Open up your heart and welcome Him. Trust me- you won't regret it.
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In moments where I used to sob, worry, and hide. . . I now laugh, raise my hands, and worship openly to God.
"Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."
- Philippians 1:6
"Now I am about to go the way of all the earth. You know with all your heart and soul that not one of all the good promises the Lord your God gave you has failed. Every promise has been fulfilled; not one has failed."
-Joshua 23:14
Sarah
