I'm Not Sure Where This Is Going. . .

Hey everyone! Welcome back to my little world of--- Did someone say tacos?!
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     I've spent the last few days not feeling too hot, and before you ask- NO, I'm referring to my overall well-being!
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     Wednesday evening I began a new Bible class on Matthew and the life of Jesus throughout the gospels. I'm taking it with one of my best friends. Granted I pass this class with a C or above, the credits will transfer to my new college in the fall, if God continues to guide me there. It's crazy hard, but I know I'm fully capable if I focus on the the true source of peace and strength throughout the next 7 weeks.
     In order to have the schedule to take this class I had to pull the plug on leading worship for a great group of middle schoolers with one of my best friends. It was a tough decision, but being able to get more and more classes out of the way is a good deal. I know for a fact God will lead me to more worship ministries in the future. I'm pretty darn thankful for the semester I was able to spend worshipping with those teens. Also, while at the youth group I upgraded from an inconvenient corded mic at my church, to a snazzy and flexible cordless at this church. . . And lemme tell ya: You're really able to get your worship on when you don't have that cord getting in the way of raising you arms!! WHO KNEW?! Maybe my church will catch up soon. . .
     As far as work goes, there is only so much more of HyVee bakeries that I can stand. . . I like my job, for the most part, but so often anymore I'm stuck working alone at nights and I'm a social butterfly. I'd enjoy having someone to chat with, and even when I have those people, there's still something missing. . . I want to be able to share Jesus with people, but I keep making excuses for myself, and because of that I'm not able to have good, healthy conversations about Christianity with my coworkers. . .
     Some spiritual encouragement has taken place in my life recently, though. I've noticed a very tiny bond beginning to shape between my younger sister and I with my faith. This excites me so much! While it is still so quiet and small, I'm patiently waiting for the next sign of growth. I've got a dry-erase board in my room, and signs hanging up with names and prayer requests on them. I'd been so bad at forgetting to pray for those on my board, but Monday evening my sister came into my room and just slipped onto my bed with a mellow face.
     "Add _____ to your prayer requests. She was just diagnosed with ______." This warmed my heart. One of her friends from small group was hurting. She's never just chimed in with something like that before, and the fact she made the first move to approach me and also come to terms on her own encouraged me.
     I spoke with my friend on the way home from my class Wednesday night, since we carpool, and I just told him I was glad to see the spark forming, but I also didn't know what to do. He proceeded to tell me that one of the most important things I can keep doing is to keep being a positive example. If it means that much to me to see her grow in her personal walk with Christ, I should keep living mine and shining my personal light. He was right. I'm not sure what it was, but after that conversation I felt inspired to really love on my little sister and do my very best to live a selfless life with her.
     After my friend told me about her break-up a few weeks ago, my sister and I were able to share a moment praying for our tempers while she stayed with us, and also for her and those who would be speaking with her. I can't remember if I mentioned this or not, but I've started to remember just how uncomfortable I was to suggest we spend some time in prayer for our friend. . . That shows how infrequently I was speaking about my faith to my sister, and that wasn't a good thing. Even my worship attitude in the car changes when she's with me. . . I thought about that on the way to town, and during our drive back home I decided to begin to let go, and my hands started raising like they normally would. I wouldn't say she noticed or thought anything of it, but it means a lot to me to be able to comfortably live out my daily faith and love for Christ without thinking twice. That has to start within my family.
     Then Thursday morning arrived. 5:30 in the morning. Wide awake before I'm supposed to be. Vet appointment for my puppy to be spayed at 7:30. Comp class at 12:50. Worship team practice later that night; guitar and singing for my role this week. There I was: sitting on the bathroom floor next to the toilet. Teddy bear in hand for comfort (your rude comments are ignored- I hold no shame,) and phone beside me incase I wanted to be "that sister" and text my sister until she woke up to come save my life. (This is the moment I realized that I really did need to clean the toilet again. My older brother kept telling me it was gross- Hmm, he was right.)
     I barely made it home from the vet visit without tossing my cookies for the third time. I spent the entire day laying down sleeping, making totally unattractive noises and acting like an invalid. I'm a pathetic sick person. In my defense, I haven't thrown up for 5 years. I was a little out of practice.
     Thankfully, after skipping class and music practice, I started to feel more like myself that evening. I slept on and off throughout the night, but did survive without up-chucking anymore of the food that wasn't left in my stomach. Morning came and I was so hungry. I can't do more than 2-3 hours without eating, guys. I'd been like 18 hours since I last ate anything and I was staring to lose touch with reality. I still skipped work that night, but I managed to write 2 papers, and work on most of my schoolwork. This morning I woke up feeling tired yet, but I worked a 7 hour shift and took my siblings to our favorite Mexican restaurant in town after my shift ended. I haven't gained my stomach space back yet, but my gosh, was that chips 'n salsa yummy. I'm saving my leftovers for snack tomorrow. . .
     I'm a bit nervous to go to church tomorrow, because plans have changed for the worship team, and I won't have had a full practice before-hand like normal. Prayers would be appreciated. It might be a rough Sunday.
     I also just took my first 2 Bible quizzes that I'm going to have due by Sunday evening every week now. I thought they'd be super hard and confusing, but thankfully (with the "take the quiz 2 times" option,) I was able to come out with a 9/10 and a 10/10. I'm not a great test-taker, but all the stress I let out over these quizzes the past few days was so unnecessary.
     I've been trying to self-talk myself through stressful moments, reminding myself that stressing out literally does nothing to help me out. It worked for the most part, and I'm hoping it continues to be effective in the upcoming week.
     This Friday I'll be worshipping with thousands of other Christians at the Winter Jam 2017 spectacular. I cannot tell you how excited I am!!! Every year I watch for the updates on who is coming to the concert, and then of course what date they'll be in my area. GUYS! SADIE FREAKING ROBERTSON IS GOING TO SPEAK THIS YEAR! I'm going to do my absolute best to meet this role-model of mine. I could probably cry while giving her a hug. Watch for the picture of us. . . I'm gonna try. . .
     I also should've probably set aside some money for merch. . . Oops. . .
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     I hope the rest of your week is spiritually refreshing and you find time to really dwell on the goodness that only comes through our Father. God bless you all!
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"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not this life more than food, and the body more than clothes?"
-Matthew 6:25

Sarah